Marriage, Christ and the Church

Biblical duties of husbands and wives are clearly outlined in God's Word. Let's explore this subject in order to encourage husbands and wives to submit themselves to God's plan and desires for your marriage, and in doing so discover a whole new and different kind of love for each other. I would first like to give you some scripture in order to help determine God's will for marriage.

1 Peter 3:7 " You Husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with some one weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the life of grace, so that your prayers will not be hindered." I feel I should explain something in this verse that is almost always misinterpreted. That being the reference to the woman as the weaker vessel. God designed and created men and women differently. I'm the assistant manager at a local store, I can tell you that some of the women that work for me are stronger and work harder than their male counter parts, unfortunately. That is not what this verse is intended to communicate. I believe that God's design is that our wives and daughters and women in general should be loved, nurtured, cared for, and protected. Woman is the most beautiful, delicate, and valuable gift God gave to man. They should be treated as such. Even being the weaker vessel they are still equal to recieve God's grace and equal as heirs to God's Kingdom. To lay a foundation for how husbands are to love their wife we look at Ephesians 5:25 "Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her." My wife who passed away over a year ago, loved this verse. Because of this verse we didn't have a lot of arguments. As a matter of fact when a disagreement had the potential for escalation into an argument she would look at me and tell me that I had better love her like the church. What she meant was to remind me that if she was expected to submit to me as her husband and in turn God, then I had better love her like Christ loved the church and treat her as an equal in the eyes of God. She also knew that I was dead serious about my responsibility to lay myself down for her as Christ did for the church. She could also invoke this verse with confidence knowing that it was my deepest desire to imitate Christ and lay myself down for her, including giving up my life for her if necessary. This always brought us back to the love that only God had given us for each other.

In Ecclesiastes 9:9 Solomon says "Enjoy life with the woman you love all the days of your fleeting life."

Ephesians 5:28 "So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself."

As the two previous verses indicated we should love and enjoy our wives because they are a blessing to us. When loving our spouses, men and women would do well to remember,

1 Corinthians 13:4 " Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails."

What a wonderful list of attributes of love.

As for you wives you also have responsibilities towards your husbands.

In Ephesians 5:33 Paul says "let the wife see that she respect your husband..." When you respect him, you notice him, regard him, honor him, prefer him, and esteem him. It means valuing his opinion, admiring his wisdom and character, appreciating his commitment to you and considering his needs and values.

I know this merely scratches the surface but I think there is an opportunity to build a good foundation for our marriage. God invented the institution of marriage, surely His word and wisdom are the most valuable. The opportunity for love and marriage done God's way is a marital relationship beyond any other marital relationship that we could manage on our own.

Once my wife and I fully submitted our lives to Christ and made Him the cornerstone of our marriage, our love became deeper and so much more rich than we could have ever imagined. It becomes our deepest desire to please and lift up our spouse, to love them, and care for them. For me my spouses welfare became more important to me than my own.

The road to a deeper, fuller, more enriched marriage relationship, with a deeper more fulfilling love for each other comes first and foremost with a relationship with Jesus Christ.

Paul gives us the formula for hierarchy of the marriage relationship in 1 Corinthians 11:3 "But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife[a] is her husband, and the head of Christ is God."

There you have it the prescription for a complete marriage as God intended. Brother and sisters may we all love God and love our spouses with a true and pure love. A love we can only find in our Savior Jesus Christ.

Numbers 6:24-26 "The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace."